About Me

1.21.2011

..a daughter's goodbye.. (3/12)


My dad wasn't really there for me and my family.. got use to his absence, but before he died I got to see him and his family.. I honestly have no deep feelings, we were like acquaintances trying not to be awkward, well that's how I thought.. Repressed anger? Nope.. Apathy? Dunno.. I have conditioned my mind years ago, that I will be respectful, and understanding of whatever happened in the past.. I didn't set expectations anymore after my 7th birthday, that defense mechanism was a smart move for me, because I don't have to look forward to anything.
I do have blurry memories with my dad, sometimes I hear songs and just wonder, but I'd rather not entertain.. I love my mom very much I don't want to make her think nor feel inadequate providing for us.


This is an unfamiliar song for me, my cousin Jenny shared it, I honestly thought she composed it for her dad,
Mr Jose Marie Chan did...

Sing me your song again, Daddy.
Sing me that happy verse.
Sing me those clever rhymes you sang
As you carried me on your shoulder.
Sing me that hymn that you so loudly

Sang in church with Mom.
Sing me those songs I know will linger
Long after you have gone.


With this song in her head, comforting and lulling her to a peaceful night..she whispers:
We'll miss you, Dad. I love you. 

Your music will live on in our hearts.

.

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thanks for taking time :)